Tuesday, August 09, 2011

Days of New

I've started a new job. This is my first time to work full time in about 9 years. I am LO-VING my new job. I don't mourn my loss of being home with the kids as I anticipated that I would. From the moment I got the call for the interview I was ready. There's something about being home with children that can take care of themselves (for the most part) that makes you feel a bit stagnant. It was wearing on me. That, and the one income. Thank you Mark for stepping in and saying "It's time". He had no idea how "time" it was.

I'm enjoying this next phase of our lives. Tired? Extremely. I will adjust. (won't I?) I enjoy waking up knowing I have a purpose...a place where I would be greatly missed if I overslept.

A buddy of Mark's came to poker last week and asked me "arent' you a little overqualified for this job?" Yeah, maybe so, but I LIKE it. I like staying busy, having multiple tasks to tend to throughtout the day and people that expect me to do certain key tasks each day. I LIKE it. So yes, I'm over-qualified to be an office manager, but I can see myself waking up and doing this job for years. Crazy, I know. I am challenged. I'm not doing what I've done for the past 14 years, but I'm ok with that. I drive 13 minutes to work each day, make a decent paycheck and I'm off by 4 to be home with the kids. I'm good. All is good.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Sorting some things out

I have written several Blog posts over the past year, but decided not to post them. So much in our lives has changed and I am confused and torn on the subject of my blog. I need to decide what this blog is to me. Is this a place where I tell all, or is this a place I tell the mostly pretty? I know that the only people who really read this are close to me, but there's still that fear of sharing too much. I typically blog to share emotion on some level or another, but this past year has been filled with emotion that relates to a subject that I'm not sure it is wise to share about. If my words only affected me, I could handle it, but when it's a third party who has no choice in the matter, I have to think twice. The need to share is overwhelming and I'm not sure why. It may be that it's just the way I process things best...through written word. Maybe this is my happy place and my extremely personal posts should be typed but not posted.

Really, I just sat down and started typing, hoping the thoughts would flow and help me find a solution. I think I've found it. Sharing the nitty gritty would be self serving (for the most part), My desire to write hasn't gone away, in fact, it's only grown stronger over this past year. I want to write and share and not worry about it. So maybe that's just what I need to do.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Blog? What Blog? Ohhh this one

Really? October 15th? The last time I blogged was October 15th? So yeah, I'm feeling a little guilty. Guilty that all of these precious memories are passing by and someday they will be all but a piece of sand. A memory forgotten. Guilty that I have family that I KNOW would like to have more of a glimpse in to our lives than a silly one liner Facebook status update. So I'm here. I've been here along, really, I have. I blog in my head regularly, but this time it's real, I'm taking the initiative to just DO IT! So much is going on in our lives, so many wonderful things and I long to recount them all. Here is my attempt.

Volleyball, Baseball, Dogs, Pudge, jobs, job possibilities, photography, friends, high school, teenage stress, working from home, not working from home, excercise, home improvement, visiting family....and the list goes on. This is what happens when you fail to document your many precious days and all that your decisions entail.

So today. All I can do is start with the now. But before the now, I have to mention Alex's last baseball game. He hit two home runs on Thursday and coach gave him the game ball, which is a huge deal in an 8 year olds world. HUGE. Unfortunately, I wasn't there to see it. I was home getting our house in order for Andy's family to come stay. And that's ok, it happens.

Yesterday we got home from the big kahuna of volleyball tournaments. The last tournament of the season for Ashley. This is the tournament that we've been getting ready for since December. We (Ashley, Alex and I) left town Friday morning for Dallas. Both kiddos missed school with the excuse that we finally had the opportunity to visit David, Cara and Cousin Keller for the first time in WAY TO LONG. It was a very long exciting, exhausting weekend. A tournament that we will never forget. Over three days, Ashley's team played a total of 27 games. Far more than our entire club volleyball season games combined. It was incredible. The Dallas Convention Center was amazing. I have never seen so many volleyball courts in one place in all of my life. There were around 100 courts all on one floor of the convention center. It's hard to even imagine.
It was a rough first 2 days. We lost several games, won a several games, but could never really get ahead. By Sunday, we had no high hopes...until coach informed the girls that even though we'd lost several games, our combined winnings had us sitting pretty. The first match on Sunday would either send us to the semifinals, or send us home. That's all the girls needed to hear. They kicked it in to over drive and proceeded to knock the tiny shorts off of that team, AND the next team. Which put us in the Championship game. Here we were after feeling so defeated the past 2 days, despite our hard work, and we find out we're in THE championship game. We were all in shock, really. They kept up their high energy game won the first game (best 2 out of 3). The next game was almost identical to the first, we were neck and neck, point for point the entire game, but the other team ended up pulling it off and winning. We were down to the third and final game. Winner takes all. It was a repeat of games one and two. We were rarely ever more than a point or two away from the other team. When we switched sides we were down by three. Unlike most times when they were behind, they pulled together and found the energy to kick some serious bootay and in the end they did it. They played like animals! It was the best game I've ever seen them play. They won first place and there wasn't a dry eye on our side of the court. It was amazing. I took over 300 pictures this weekend and at some point I'll find the energy to actually edit and post them. I'm still trying to recover from such a full weekend. And that's me...the one who was on the side lines. I can't even imagine what Ashley feels like. 27 games! REALLY! Youth is amazing, it really is.

So there you have it, my first update since October. I have so much more to say, but I will have to save it all for another post. Life is good. These are the days to hold on to.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

2nd Grade

Up until this year, Alex has breezed his way through school. His teachers have adored him, he's excelled way beyond his grade level and was placed in GT in Kindergarten. Now, here we are in second grade, which happens to be the first year that report card grades are numbers as opposed to letters and we are struggling. He's certainly not struggling to learn the second grade material, he's struggling with the most BASIC tasks. His handwriting is atrocious. He naturally rushes through the classwork because it is simple which in turn makes his handwriting even worse than ordinary. He is bringing home class work with failing grades regularly. He rushes through the most SIMPLE assignments and ends up getting half the questions wrong because of it, either that or he completely skips questions, or entire pages...during class. Something I have no control over. Up until this year his teachers have been so accepting of handwriting weakness, even told me how in the big picture it's not that important, but it is. He's missing questions because his "a"'s look like "u"'s, and his "g"'s look like "Y"'s. Silly stuff that I know is important, but really?? Important enough for my son to fail? I'm so upset. I don't know what to do other than keep these failing papers and make him redo them on the weekends...which we WILL be doing this weekend. So far second grade has not been about learning academics, it's been 100% about learning to conform. I know he needs to learn this. It just makes me so sad to see him struggle with work that he was able to do in KINDERGARTEN, meanwhile, he's spending so much time on these BASIC tasks that it really feels like he's missing out on learning new things...learning about the things that he sooo desperately wants to learn about. I feel like he's a sponge that's drying up while dotting his i's, and perfecting his handwriting. I know his interest in learning is going to slowly diminish, it's only natural. I want to pull him out of class and feed that thirst, but I can't

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Day 6 - 9 The Love Dare

Not a lot of juice in these last few days, at least no real juice to write about. Mark and I are really noticing that we do most of the love dare challenges on a daily basis without even thinking about it. We've reflected on how far we've come in our marriage and how fortunate we are to have one another. I'm looking forward to the weekend when we can focus a little more time on the challenge...this first week of school has me WORE OUT. Here were the challenges for the past few days:

Day 6 - Love is not irritable
Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life

Day 7 -Love Believes the Best
For today’s dare, get two sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second sheet. Place both sheets in a secret place for another day. There is a different purpose and plan for each. At some point during the remainder of the day, pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank your spouse for having this characteristic.

Day 8 -Love is not jealous
Determine to become your spouse’s biggest fan and to reject any thoughts of jealousy. To help you set your heart on your spouse and focus on their achievements, take yesterday’s list of negative attributes and discreetly burn it. Then share with your spouse how glad you are about a success he or she recently enjoyed.

Day 9 - Love makes good impressions
Think of a specific way you’d like to greet your spouse today. Do it with a smile and with enthusiasm. Then determine to change your greeting to reflect your love for them.

Moving on to Day 10, I'm fairly certain I will have a decent post for this day!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Day 5 - The Love Dare

Love is not rude.

Day 5
Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only.

Ick. I was NOT looking forward to this one. The kids on the other hand, LOVED the thought of picking each other apart. I had to have a conversation with them about the purpose of this challenge, because on the surface, it really just appeared to be another way to start an argument. I *think* they got it. Their lists were fairly predictable, although Ashley did get a little carried away and came up with 5 instead of 3...and then tacked the paper to his wall. Lovely. Today I'm going to ask her for a redo, and for her not be so harsh in her choice of words.

Mark and I didn't get around to this challenge until late last night, and ended up staying up past midnight discussing. Last night I realized that I had built this challenge up so much in my mind that I was actually dreading having to bring it up. I guess my fears were that I was going to learn something about myself that would be hard to hear, and more specifically, hard to change. I was also not looking forward to the possibility of hurting Mark's feelings. I now realize that my fears were much larger than they needed to be. We had an extremely productive conversation, and learned a little bit about each other. Really, our issues with each other are so, so tiny when weighed with what we love about each other. And with every item on each of our lists, we discovered that in order to have what we have in our life together, these things are necessary on at least some level. They could certainly improve, but they are there only as a result of the efforts we make for our family. Behind each irritant is a good intention, and that leaves me feeling oh so thankful.

Meatless Take 2

Back on the wagon it seems. Last night Mark made a yummy dinner, grilled chicken, sausage and some fixins. Ash ate Mac and cheese, corn and crescent roll...all on a yellow plate. Can you say STARCH. Looks like we're going to have to do some better meal planning with a vegetarian in the house.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Meatless Update

We went to dinner last night for mexican. She ate a taco...with MEAT! Not sure if it was a brief hiatus or the end of a very short era. Only time will tell!

Conversations with Alex

This morning we were discussing the precautions that we need to take with Abby now that she's on a special diet to prevent her allergies and how easy it would be for her to get ahold of the other dogs food. After a long concentrated facial expression, Alex says "Sometimes dogs can be very fragile, just like frogs." ????

Another conversation this morning...we were discussing the different methods of plant proppegation and I asked him if he remembers how we propegated our Sago Palms. He thought for a minute, gave me a silly look and said "You put the lime in the coconut?"

After the propegation conversation, he said he'd like to do a science project at school one day to test how a plant would grow in different soil types and one test could be "just water with plant vitamins".

I just LOVE how a 5 minute conversation with him can be so entertaining and so educational all at the same time.

Day 4 - The Love Dare

Love is Thoughtful

Day 4 Challenge:

Contact your spouse sometime during the business of the day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.

Day 4 was an all around challenge, but not necessarily challenge specific. Between the stressors of work, the sick dog, the leaking pool (a whole other post), and children with cabin fever Mark and I were not exactly on the same page yesterday. We took Abbie to the vet together mid-day and made a trip to Pets Mart...so I decided that yesterday was not a good day for this challenge. I think it would have been more irritating than anything to get a phone call in the short span of time that we were not at home together and needing to catch up with work to see how the other's day was going. I know that sounds somewhat shallow, but really, despite my feeling as though I was at work for 12 hours yesterday, I was really only there for 3. We will take this challenge and throw it in on a random day.

Alex, my little buddy, had no problem with today's challenge. He has really surprised me these last few days. He's gone from complete challenge pessimism, to challenge king. He is always the first to ask what the next days challenge will be, and always the first to accomplish it. Yesterday, on three separate occasions, he asked each of us how our day was. I'm so impressed with how he's taken hold of this challenge and made it his own.

I'm not looking forward to the Day 5 challenge today, but I'm working on coming to terms with it.